Paulo’s House of Extraordinary Meals

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People say that Paulo’s not a real chef – that he was kicked out of every major cooking school around, and just opened a restaurant anyway. They say his ‘restaurant’ is just a little room that only has one table, and his menu only ever has one item, too. But the same people say to me, ‘If you only ever go to one restaurant in your life, make it Paulo’s.”

What’s so special about this restaurant? Well, I decided to ask some people, ‘What’s it like to eat at Paulo’s?’

——————

Sharon was a young lady, probably in her late 20s, though she didn’t act like it. She had blonde curls, which were a pretty bad dye-job, and a rather nasal voice. This is what she had to say:

Sharon

So, anyways, before going to see this guy, Paulo, I’d been on the dating ‘scene’ for a year or so. I went speed-dating, online dating, even freed-dating.

“Freed dating?” I asked.

Ya don’t wanna know, Mister. Anyways, so I’d given up on everything else, and someone said to go to Paulo’s. Stuff happens when you go there, ya know?

“Stuff?”

Stuff. Anyways, in I went, and it’s this tiny place, dim lights, an’ creepin’ me out. And the guy’s short and fat and …greasy. And he’s like, ‘Welcome to Paulo’s House of Extraordinary Meals. What’s your story, little lady?’ Little lady, seriously…So I tells him, about my guy troubles, and he picks out a menu. There’s about fifty of them.

“And what did yours have on it?”

‘Dramatically Delectable Dater’s Curry’, it said. So, I had the curry, of course. And it was like, the best meal I ever had! Trouble was, it was hot hot hot, and I’d never had curry before.

So next thing, I’m rushing off to the hospital –

“Because of the curry?”

It was spicy, Mister! I was burning up, thought I was dying. Anyways, I get there, and and then there’s this doctor, this gorgeous, dreamy looking guy. We chatted away, and he was interested in me, and we went out on a date! That was three years ago, and we’re married now. Me, married to a doctor! And I just wanted some luck in speed-dating, or even freed-dating…

——————

Wilson was just a typical businessman – middle-aged, grey suit, and a forgettable personality. Here’s the story of his visit to Paulo’s:

Wilson

I went in to this place, and Paulo – he’s Italian, rather stocky gentleman, says to me, ‘Welcome to Paulo’s House of Extraordinary Meals. What’s your story, sir?’

So, I told him how I’d been really wanting the next project coming up, and that it’d probably get me a promotion. But, for all my hard work, it looked like someone else was going to get it instead. He gave me a menu, which just had one thing on it: ‘Wonderful Worker’s Worrisome Buffet’. So, I ask for it, and he says to me, ‘Can you switch the phone to silent? It disturbs my cooking.’ So I switched it off, reluctantly.

“And how was the meal?” I asked.

The best meal I’ve ever had, hands down. I had course after course, and didn’t stop for a long while. I must have been a lot hungrier than I thought; by the time I left that place, it was a few hours later and I had several missed calls. Turned out, I missed my chance for a new project they were offering to me, and they gave it to another guy instead. Something about an urgent thing that had to be started right away, big profits apparently.

“And you missed it?”

Yes, and that was the luckiest thing that ever happened to me. The project was a big flop – the clients didn’t know what they wanted, and it all ended pretty badly. But just the next week, out of nowhere came the offer I’d wanted, and that project went perfectly, with me at the head. I got the promotion I wanted, and a few more. That meal made my career.

——————

So, after hearing those stories, I’ve decided I’ll give it a try. I wonder what’s waiting for me at Paulo’s House of Extraordinary Meals.


Written for the Weekly Writing Challenge at http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2013/06/03/weekly-writing-challenge-1000-words-three/

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2 thoughts on “Paulo’s House of Extraordinary Meals

  1. What a brilliant concept! I love this piece. The characters are very distinct, and I love how the meals led them to something apparently bad, but actually very good. I wonder if this Paulo is related to the writer, Paulo Coelho. This is a delightful story. Great job!

    • Thanks very much! I’m very glad you enjoyed the story, and was hoping the idea would come through alright. Wasn’t thinking of that author when I was writing, Paulo was just a random name for me (I actually haven’t read any of his works). Thanks again!

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